Put your Hands up

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I don’t know what’s in the water now a days but these kids lost their minds.

Christmas just passed and my son just wanted a Sony PlayStation 4 and PlayStation gift card ($50) to buy things while he’s playing Fortnight. In order for him to play this fortnight he must buy the PlayStation Plus (to play online). He spent $20 on V Bucks (money) on fortnight l, and I was going to put in the rest for his PlayStation plus membership which is $60.

I enter the card in but got a Declined message 😳

I entered the card in again and was Declined 🧐

Third time is always the charm right? Negative card Declined Again.

Now he’s looking at me with the dumb look 🥴

like if he stands there long enough he would become invincible. I asked him what happened to all the money on the card. He looks me in my eyes and tells me

I don’t know I just went crazy with the V Bucks ” 🤷🏾‍♂️

At this point we need to touch gloves and square up like two Men and go crazy with these Hands.

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Bathroom Etiquette

If you walk into a bathroom with three urinals and two (the ones on the ends) are occupied, you Must go into the available stall.
   If said stall is occupied,then proceed to the far east of the bathroom were you can be waiting to go next. At No time should you use the urinal in between those two men.
   The only time where you can use said urinal is in a dire emergency where you cannot hold it. In this case, you respectfully approach the urinal with your head down and your eyes on your own prize. Use the bathroom, wash your hands, and don’t ever speak of using that middle urinal to anyone.
   Prime example, during an afternoon of drinking and football, I went to use the bathroom. While in said bathroom, there was no one else in there. Of course l,
being the proper gentleman I am,  still went to the far left urinal. Another guy, who I previously thought was a gentleman, comes in almost stumbling to the urinal directly next to me. C’mon sir respect the rules and respect me as a man. My level of uncomfort instantly goes up because now I have to be on guard like if I’m using the bathroom in a prison. If I was a thug I would have peed on his leg but that wouldn’t have been the proudest moment in my life.

Chapter in my ebook

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07LF7DL9B/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_vl.fCbPYCQ66G

Selling That Work

It’s that time of the year when kids are selling candy
It’s like the Mexican Cartel at work
U got ur Big Timers candy sellers (The Plug), ur small time sellers and ur new comers…Don’t let a new comer invade ur floor or u losing ur customers.
I was asked to buy some candy but it seems like they sent me to do something else
I was told to go by the Water Cooler and wait for someone to come
I tell them what I want and give them the Money…wait a few weeks and the Product is shipped in…
I almost forgot what side I was working on
The two ppl will remains Tagless to protect their identities
😂😂😂😂🍫🍫🍫

Boys & Toys

Little boys do the weirdest things
My daughter plays with her dolls one doll stops being friends with the other & that’s it
I’m still trying figure out what kind of game my son was playing that he needed his wrestling man to get stuck in the middle of the toilet roll…while the roll was still being in use by everyone
#ToysAndSons

Day Off From Life

My job allows me to see inside Ppls homes…
I should have known something was wrong when they gave a warning
She said “plz EXCUSE the house”
Not thinkin nothing of it cause she do have kids
Soon the door opened I was hit with a amazement of how many shit was on the floor
Almost like she said Fuck That My Husband got 2 jobs (Everybody Hates Chris)
Then come to find out the kids wasn’t there all week
Its like she “EXCUSED” herself from cleaning

Down For Repairs

Son was trying to use the bathroom (#1) & I guess he didn’t have to go anymore so he tells me “Daddy it’s not working”
So had to teach him a on the spot life lesson & tell him to NEVER use those words in the same sentence just say “Its down for maintenance at the moment & it will be back shortly…god bless goodnight”

Late Night IPhone Sexting

This right here will break or make ur night u be waiting & waiting for that message to turn blue until u get that “I’m sleep” text back…BUT u Textin tho & u Liking pics 😂😂😂